Many years ago, we were called the “boat people,” because every time we went into the local thrift store we were looking for attire for our next cruise. This was just our thing to do. Vacationing is a way of life and so many people would ask how we were able to afford this. Well, the first clue is that we were called this in the local thrift store. I mean, seriously, when were we ever gonna wear those dresses again? Vacationing defined us. People were always asking about this trip or that location and we did this on minimal income.
When the girls turned 6 months old (the youngest allowed on a cruise ship), yep, you guessed it, we were boarding in Miami! It was the perfect trip as we convoyed three vehicles from West Virginia to enjoy this milestone, this entrance into the family addiction to vacationing.
In March of 2017, we were approaching the one year mark on our CPS case. The house was empty and our momentum was beginning to decline. The lawyers had told us to stop looking for any other explanations in the case and to just use everything that we had done to show our side in court. The court date was approaching and idle time began to take its toll.
Then, we remembered who we are and how much of “us” the case had taken. We spent time with the children that week at our visits, packed up the van, and my mother (Nanny), my daughter (Ashley), and I made the drive to Port Canaveral to board a ship.
WHAT!!!! People were quick to ask if we had lost our minds. “Won’t this look bad in your case?” “How can you have fun while the children are going through this?” “How can you afford this with all of the legal fees and associated costs?” “This is soooo irresponsible.”
In short, our response was, “we had no choice.”
If we would have entered that courtroom having forgotten who we were as a family, then we would not have been able to portray this to the judge. If we had entered that courtroom looking defeated, then we would have been defeated. We had spent nearly a year looking through medical files, legal cases, attending visits, attending doctor appointments, sitting up at night crying in the silence. This had drained our very spirits and, when there was no more research to do, we felt hopeless.
So, we found ourselves again. We found our strength. We took a moment to remember how important it is to enjoy each moment of our lives and the people who are in them. We laughed. We cried. We stared out into the horizon and envisioned what was just on the other side.
When we came home, we approached that horizon. We entered that courtroom claiming that our family would be returned. And they were!
CPS takes everything that they can from you. They not only alienate you from your children but also from your very being, your soul until there is nothing left of you to fight for. Hold on to who you are because, WHEN your children come home, they are going to need that person to be there!
You are Important Too!