I am a member of several groups on Facebook regarding the fight against CPS. I acknowledge that many of you may still be under the misconception that Child Protective Services is in place to “save” children and, in some rare instances, this is true. However, from our experience and the experiences of many others, there is a broken and corrupt system at play here that is systematically reassigning children for profit. Now, I do not intend to debate with anyone, at least not at this point, the logistics of the system, the money trail, or the abuse in foster care. Instead, I want you all to take a moment and pray for the families who are struggling with losing their children. The mothers who have jumped through the impossible hoops of “improvement plans” only to face termination of their parental rights. The addicts who have gotten clean. Those who have never had a drug problem. The mothers and fathers who have lost their children due to the behaviors of their significant others who they have left at the first sign of trouble.
I read the posts online and I see the despair. I read the articles about mothers and fathers who have taken their own lives in the face of losing their children. Did you know, if they ask for mental health aid during a CPS case that this is used against them to show instability? Would you need therapy if your children were ripped from your dinner table? Would that show you as being unfit or so loving that you cannot imagine your life without your children? Is it wrong that mothers and fathers define their identity as such?
I read of a woman who had been clean from drugs for many years yet, someone accused her of using again. She tested clean but because she had a history of drug use, the state took her children to “be safe” and promised to return them once they were sure that she was clean. Many years later, still fighting the system, she gave up. She gave them what they wanted. She returned to drugs and once they had broken her, they adopted her children to another family.
They will try to break you. They will use every ounce of your past against you. They will bring up things that have nothing to do with your ability to parent. They will make your love for your children look like your weakness or your ability to remain calm look like a lack of caring. They will try everything that they can to keep your children once they have them.
These are the realities of CPS. These are scary facts that may make you wonder how I can say to keep fighting. Why not give up if they are going to keep going? The answer is simple:
These are your children!
Be mad. Be angry. Be hurt. Be sad. But do not alter in your presentation of yourself. Do not be weak inside because they will use it against you. Do not give up! Do not give them what they want, your children, without a fight because there is hope. We are hope. Right now, the children who they tried to steal are eating breakfast and planning out the day. We are still recovering. There are still questions. But we are getting through it as a family. You will too. So please, to the men and women who are considering giving up, who are considering suicide or drugs, your children need to know now, more than ever, that you will not give up on them!
My heart aches for these families. Please, take a moment to educate yourself on what is happening in our country and around the world. Please take a moment to pray for those who are sad and uplift those who need a hand.
Be a friend. Lend an ear. Make a change.